TEACHING KIDS ABOUT KIND SPEECH

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), kids benefit from etiquette reminders because their rudeness isn't intentional.  They often don't know it's impolite to make comments about a person's age or appearance.  They might say, "Grannie, your shoes look like old lady shoes, and your face sure has a lot of wrinkles!"

Remarking on Someone's Appearance:  Should Total Honesty Rule?
Is it ever OK to cause other people to feel hurt if we comment negatively and out loud in front of others about their appearance?  Those who champion "total honesty" for children  overlook the cultural norm that we take responsibility for the effect of our words and behavior on others.  

In every culture, without exception, social development requires all members to be aware of the feelings of others and refrain from airing tactless, taunting remarks about people's appearance.  If commenting on someone's appearance, we want to express a positive perspective that makes them feel good about themselves.
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To help your child develop good social skills (the ones that get them noticed for all the right reasons) explain that it's better to say nothing about a person's appearance, and be a role model in teaching your children about the common courtesies of life.